delayed studio post

I haven't posted in about two weeks. I feel bad about this even though probably no one cares except me and maybe two other people.

I drank coffee out of a novelty sized 'Asterix et Obelix' mug. It holds about three times a normal mug.

I felt 'insane' and tired after drinking it.

There is about a week left of summer studio time before fourth year starts.

I feel like I only just started to take it 'seriously'.

I feel worried often about the inconsistencies between my desire to be productive and my lack of self motivation.

I think I like people more who work really hard and make stuff, and I want to be more like that so people will like me.

I feel like my life up until now has been extremely static and will change drastically in the next year. I imagine it as a squirrel staying very still and alert, pretending not to see me approaching, holding my hand out like I have food for it even though I clearly do not. It observes me warily, shivers slightly, flinches, then bolts up a tree.

I feel like I have had too much caffeine today.